Meeting Surya after 9 years

Yesterday turned out to be a wonderful day. Met Suryakant after some 9 years. Also met a few other school friends and it was absolutely great. It does feel great to meet old friends and relive those moments; to walk down the memory lane knowing how good those days were and also that they won't come back. But then that's what memories are; and more the happy memories the more you know you have had a good time.

Going back to yesterday I was to meet Surya at around 12 noon at CP. Deepak was to join us. I got a little late and met Surya at around 1 PM. We had a walk in the inner circle catching up on the updates from the past 9 years. Its not that we don't talk or don't have the updates but its just catching the details we might have missed. Surya has changed somewhat over the years in his appearance and I couldn't recognize him at first. He has put on some weight as well which I guess is normal in our lives.

We both had been trying Deepak's no since morning but he wasn't picking. Surya decided to call aunty (Deepak's mom) and enquire about him. Aunty told that he was taking a bath. Surya told aunty to lock Deepak in the bathroom so that he doesn't leave home and that we are comming to his home. We took the metro from CP to Tilak Nagar. Deepak called in the meanwhile and we decided to meet at Tilak Nagar metro station. As we reached Tilak Nagar the schooldays came back - how we used to walk from there to Deepak's house, sometimes took bus no 808, how we used to roam around there. It had been a long time since I last came to Deepak's house.

We reached Deepak's place and met aunty. It was nice to see her after so many years and it felt great when she recognized us. A thought crossed my mind - 'Its these time when you miss the old days so much and wish why you didn't do this for such a long time.' We sat there chatting over a cup of tea. Sandeep's (Deepak's younger brother) friends came there and as they waited for Sandeep who was sleeping they asked us about playing football. Neither me nor Surya have ever said no to football; so there we were agreeing to play football. We went to a park in Janak Puri to play football. We were 8 people in total and played a 4-a-side match. It was so good to be playing football after a very long time; and it showed. Stamina was zero. Within 5 minutes I was out of breadth. Sandeep seemed to be a good player. Deepak and Surya have always been good. I had lost the old touch and just about managed to hang in there. All I could think was "I need to work out a bit"

After the match we went back to Deepak's house. There we had lunch. Food was great and I had to go for a second filling despite not being too hungry. And after that I felt like sleeping. Deepak had similar ideas but Surya dragged us out. We had to go to Rajouri to meet Vaibhav.Sudhanshu was also comming there.

We reached Rajouri to find Vaibhav waiting for us. Vaibhav has recently moved to Hyderabad and was back home here for vacations. He hadn't changed much over the years in appearance. We decided to go to KFC. Sudhanshu had joined us by then (he came all the way from MDI Gurgaon). As we sat in KFC we started talking about the school days. Vaibhav seemed to be in a different world as he continuously drifted towards girls. Surya, Sudhanshu and Deepak were having a serious conversation on Telengana-Andhra divide when Surya suddenly asked Vaibhav (who had been quiet this time) "Kya soch raha hai?" Vaibhav replied "Akon ka ek gana chal raha hai mere dimaag mein" On being asked which song it was Vaibhav replied "I wanna F#$% you" and everyone looked at him surprised then burst out laughing. To stop Vaibhav from speaking we had to call Manas (Manas used to be a terror in our schooldays and Vaibhav still fears him :)).

Having spent a good hour or so chatting it was time to leave. As we walked out of the mall we met C Mohan Surya. And as we talked we remembered how Mohan had broken his leg while playing cricket in class XI. Deepak wanted to have some picture together but the light didn't allow us to do so. Finally we said goodbyes and went our separate ways.

Now that I am writing this it feels like I just came from the get together; in fact the school days seem like yesterday. It felt so wonderful to meet Surya after so many years. He is still the same Surya - same way of talking, same behavior, same expressions. Maybe he has changed and it was that way because we met after such a long time that we became what we were when we were in school. I missed Manas and Bobo yesterday coz if they were there then it would have been the complete group; but maybe that will happen sometime in future. Just hoping that time comes sooner rather than later.

A Long Vacation

Its probably the 1st time that I have taken a vacation without any prior plans. Its the 2nd day of my vacations and I have been lazing around for the 2 days at home (apart from a trip to Food Bazaar and Jal Board). And most of the time I have been hooked to Facebook playing Cafe World and Farmville. Eating home cooked food is another thing I have enjoyed. Its not that I stay away from home, its just that the office timings are such that the meal timings are all messed up and I mostly have food in the office. For two days sitting at home and eating has been very welcome.

Of course going on a vacation is not something that is appreciated by your office but this being the end of year and my vacations going to lapse they didn't have much of a choice; so I took the vacation. But the days prior to this were very hectic - additional work was added to cover up some time in the vacation. Of course the work was all tended to and other things taken care of. And now its time to enjoy.

So now that the vacation is on what do I intend to do? Lets see...
- Catching up with friends is the first thing on my mind
- Watching movies '3 Idiots' and 'Avatar' (in 3D hall) is another thing in my mind
- Meeting a school friend (Suryakant Shukla) after some 9 years has been planned
- Planning an outing for the new year is to be done - Manas should take care of this
- Lots of sleep is another thing making its presence felt
- Some reading will also happen

Quite a few things to do and I am looking forward to it all. Will keep you posted; till then enjoy.
And yes Merry Christmas.

A weekend well spent

It was a nice weekend. Got up late and called Manas to finalise the program. We decided to meet in CP around 5 PM. Sudhanshu called later informing he wouldn't make it as he had some work to finish in his college. After having lunch I left for CP and met Manas at Odeon. I wanted to watch the movie 'Paa' while he wanted to see 'Radio' (he exactly didn't want to watch either but preferred Radio over Paa). Fortunately there was no show for Radio and so we bought the tickets for Paa for the 7:20 PM show. Deepak said he would join us once the movie was over.
The movie was pretty good. I quite liked it but Manas didn't (mainly because he didn't want to like it :)). Amitabh has done a great job. I feel Abhishek's role could have been shorter and more of Vidya Balan & Amitabh could have been shown. But still the movie is a good watch. And once again I fell in love with Vidya Balan - she's just amazing :).
After the movie we met Deepak. He was at a restaurant/bar called 'Maharani Addicton' with his friend. We sat there for sometime talking and drinking - Deepak and his friend were having Beer, Manas had a mocktail while I had red wine. We spent more than an hour there chatting. Then we started towards home. We dropped Deepak's friend at his home and moved to Manas's home. We spent the night at Manas's place doing absolutely nothing. Not exactly - we were reading comics runnning through movies and watching a few as well. We finally went to sleep around 2 AM.
Next morning I woke up at 11 AM. Deepak had to go to play football at 6 AM; he had woken up then, confirmed that he was comming and slept again :). Manas was up by 8. Deepak rushed to his Dance class at 11 AM without having breakfast. I and Manas went to District Centre to have breakfast and then proceeded towards Saket to visit the new DT Mall. There we roamed aimlessly for an hour or two. We went to a 'Coffee Beans and Tea Leaf' where I had a tea for Rs 130 :). Then Manas dropped me home. It was a weekend well spent.

Just thinking...

Right now I am sitting in office waiting for the clock to strike 10:15 so that I can leave for home. Ya its Friday night and I can't wait to get home but that's not the only reason. Its been a day with very little work. Comming in this shift has its cons and one of them is that most of your office mates have already left for home; so now when you have lots of time you don't have someone to spend it with.
I tried playing but after sometime it felt strange to play in office and so I stopped.
No friend is online so no chatting.
Already had 2 cups of coffee today so no more of coffee.
Went out for shopping as well today.

Fridays are supposed to be good but I am not feeling that way right now. With not much to do the mind is playing its own games, twisting and turning in and out of thoughts, getting caught in its own web before breaking free and again getting caught, sometimes catching my attention and at other times wandering aimlessly, giving new ideas only to dismiss them soon, at times listening to the song being played with a quick glance at the clock and maybe thinking about what to write next.
Last night I felt as if I lost my touch for writing (not that I am a good writer but whatever little I come out with the words failed me yesterday as I couldn't write anything on something I wanted to) but the words seem to be comming at this moment. That's encouraging at this point. I am already thinking about the next topics to write on :). Till then ...

a thing beyond forever

I have been reading a lot for the past few months. In fact I have read quite a few books in this period. Last night I finished another book which is titled 'a thing beyond forever' by Novoneel Chakraborty. The book also goes on to add this after the title 'The reward for every true love is not love...'.
I must admit that this is not one of the best books I have read but still I am talking about this book because there's something that happened as I was reading the book yesterday night. A certain section of the book sent a shiver across my body which I can still feel as I write this post. The section talks about rebirth but its the sequence of events before it that create the plot and its written beautifully. And it made my mind wander into a place reminiscent of what was described in the book where I was actually trying to visualize the possibility of such occurance. I ended up thinking for sometime before returning to the book; and then again thinking about it once I finished the book. The book ended up in the only way it could giving me more to think as to why things are the way they are. And I couldn't find any answer to it.
But there were few lines in the book which I really liked and I will mention some of those here -
"the right ingredients make the food tasty but sharing the food with right people makes it special"
"Everyone is someone yet to be identified"
"at times a food needs time to cook itself without the chef having to do anything"
"All unreasonable things have a reasonable reason and all reasonable things have an unreasonable reason"

A tryst with plays

A few weeks back I went to see a play. Its hard to believe but I really did go; on some insistence from a good friend. The whole concept of theatre seems old and outdated to me so I am not a big fan of plays. Its not that I hate plays or something like that, its just that I don't feel like going to see a play. I must admit though that there are times when I actually think I should go and watch something similar but its few and far between :).

So I and my friend went to watch a play. A third friend was to join us but he got some last minute work and couldn't come. The play was at some auditorium near Mandi House (oh I don't remember the name of the audi). The play was titled Kanjoos. As we bought the tickets I couldn't help but notice that there were few in fact more than few people who had come to see the play. Most of the people were either more than 35 years old and/or looked artistic (men in kurta, long hair/beard; women with jhola type bags). There were a few like me also - you can call them out of place. Seeing the crowd "Duniya mein bewacoofon ki kami nahi hai" came out of my mouth and my friend gave me one of her usual angry looks. Her reply "Nahi dekhni to mat dekho". The play was scheduled to start at 4 PM but didn't start until 4:20 PM. Everything from selling tickets to lighting was managed by the group. I expected the play to start on time but it didn't which convinced me further that this was going to be boring. But kehte hai na "Okhli mein sir de hi diya hai to mooslon se darna kya" - so I went ahead. As I entered the audi and saw the surroundings it reminded me of an old college auditorium. I couldn't believe that it didn't have ac; it had the big fans (baba aadam ke zamane ke) and when the fans were switched on I thought they are going to fall.

Well as the play was about to start my friend assured me for the upteenth time "Its gonna be good" and I gave her the same smile for the nth time. The play finally began. It didn't start off well and so I started looking at other people - mostly to see if there were others getting as bored as I was. I saw a few young couples enjoying (each other's company and not the play); which gave me one reason to watch a play - watch a play when on a date and you get a place where there isn't much crowd and no one disturbs you :P. The play continued meanwhile in the monotonous way and I wondered if anyone was actually enjoying the play; but one never knows what one likes (in other words there was no way of finding out). As the moments went by I found that even my friend wasn't finding the play good.

The play finally ended and it was the best thing to happen to me in the last couple of hours :). As we came out my friend said "This wasn't good. We will go for some other play sometime". An expression of surprise crossed my face. I said "Isse ji nahi bhara? You are asking me for another one" She just smiled and said "Plays are good and next time I will take you to a better play". I didn't say anything and we came out heading to our respective homes.

The play didn't turn out to be good but the entire episode made me notice that there are people who still watch plays and there are people who have theatre as profession. For someone to actually start liking plays the plays need to be much better. And so needs to be the ambience. Cost is a factor but if plays are to be made popular the ambience needs to be better. As for me, well, if plays are like the one I watched I won't be going for any more plays; but if plays are better I might try it out again.

Catch up/Get-together/Party - whatever it was, it was fun

Last Friday I had a dinner planned out with my friends. I have been asked not to reveal their identities so I will call them M, V and S. We started as cab mates (although now we very rarely go in the same cab) and now we are friends. We had planned to meet at 7:30 PM and go to a place called Barrique near our office. We were planning to meet for sometime but there was no concrete plans so one day I had sent a mail to finalise the plan. The plan came through and there we were at 7:30 PM on Friday evening in front of our office building. The others had decided to come 10 minutes early while I got down just in time finishing a call. And we headed towards Barrique.

My idea of it was a restaurant but it turned out to be a bar. There was no seating available when we reached so we came out and decided to go to Mojo. On the way I asked "Are we going to drink?" The three of them gave me a surprised look and replied "It's by default." M asked "You don't drink?" I replied "Not if I have to go to office" V said "You don't have to return to office. I can get the cab booked for you." I said "No thanks. I have some work left and then its a question of ethics" They didn't say anything then and we reached Mojo.

As we were given the menus they asked me a second time about drinks and I politely refused. We ordered our drinks and snacks - M went for white wine, S for Whisky, V for Beer and I for a drink called Tantra which was some version of lemonade. For snacks we ordered chilly chicken without capsicum (that's for me) and chilly mushroom.

I noticed quite few things about the others that evening. I didn't expect M to be ready for a drink during office; it was quite unusual for her to do so from what I knew of her. S was somewhat subdued the whole time. I thought it was because of his lack of preparation for an interview the next day. I guess all 3 of us thought so. We found out later that it was something else. With less than half an hour to go for his cab he said the first thing he would do is to have a smoke when he went down. V said "Smoking is allowed here". S was pleasantly surprised and exclaimed "Really". He then looked at M and she said she had no problem. The moment S heard that he lit up a cigarette. His joy knew no bounds and he was a completely transformed person thereafter. I didn't know S was so shy as to not even express his desire to us; and also that he was so much addicted to smoke. V turned out to be connoisseur in terms of drinks and food. The food he ordered was really tasty. In fact I ate mushroom (don't tell my mom :)) which I don't like. In terms of drinks he asked for the wine bottle and read the contents to find out if it would be bitter or sweet. And he went on to tell the various wines he had consumed - ranging from 4 pounds to 100 pounds - when he was in UK. And he also told about the last few days when he had been drinking like anything. And he went mentioning what are the best foods available in the nearby food joints. I had never thought he would be so much into these things.

It was after a very long time that I was having lemonade when others were having hard drinks. Not that I drink too much but I am game for one once a while. And I had this urge to have a glass of red wine but I resisted. After all I was the principled guy :). The conversation went from food and drinks to future plans to have similar get-togethers. S suggested we could meet on a weekend as well as we all lived nearby to which V replied something like "I am a family fan" while M responded with "And I am a bahu" to which all laughed.

Moments like these spent with friends when there are no worries, no deadlines, nothing to attend to, just being yourself and enjoying the moments, is a rarity these days. So when you do get them you feel like staying there forever. But like all good things come to an end the evening ended with 3 of us heading to office while S to cab.

A note on get-togethers

Planning for a party or get-together is a big challenge these days. On a high level it doesn't look too difficult - you just have to decide a venue and time and then let others know - pretty simple right? Wrong! Lets take the things one by one.
1) Venue - If people really want to come the venue doesn't matter. True. But these days people are so busy that they don't want to travel too much. So you have to chose a venue that falls somewhere in the middle for everyone who you plan to invite.
2) Time - The same could be said about time - if one wants to attend something he/she will find time. But people have so many things to do that they can only offer a time slot in which to fit in the get-together.
3) Inviting people - Some people would be too busy to talk; some would need to take permission from various sources; some people would already have a lot of work to do on that day.

So you see its not so easy to organize a get-together. And if you somehow manage to come up with a plan fulfilling all the constraints people would come up with last minute excuses. Some would fall sick, some would have some urgent work to attend to which they had no idea of earlier, some would be too tired to come. etc. And the worst part of it all is that the people who back out in the end are the people who would come up with let's meet sometime thing. They would be so eager to meet everyone that they would say that they would come no matter what. And then they would back out in the very last minute.
I don't understand why these people say so when they have no intention of attending the meet. I mean you need not say that you don't want to meet, just don't have to talk about it. But no; they have to show their interest only for the sake of showing that they care.

Recently I had been involved in 3 get-togethers. The first one involved my school friends last Saturday. It was a working day for me. One of my friend had come to the town and was to leave on Sunday, so Saturday was the only day we could meet. I don't drive so he offered to drop me home if we got late. We met at around 8:15 PM at India Gate. Then we went to CP where we met 2 more friends. Another friend who was on a date came down around 11:30 PM to meet us. It was great fun being together after a very long time and it was fun. I felt that when you really want to meet a friend you can take that time out and make the effort.
The 2nd one didn't went as expected with 2 of the friends not turning up at all and a 3rd friend making a sort of guest appearance. But the other 2 friends did stay for long and we had a good time going back to the college days and going on till future. And the friends who stayed long - one of them is doing part time MBA and came straight from his college after giving 3 exams; while the other who is married had gone out the day before and could have rested this day but chose to come. It again pointed that there are friends who really want to meet.
The 3rd get-together actually happened today and it was fun in more ways than one. First I thought we were going for dinner but it turned out to be something else. Then you got to know them better and got to know something new about them. And this we had to have between our office hours. While one of the friends stayed late for this others had to stretch their working hours to make this happen. I think nothing more needs to be said.
Sometimes it really feels good to be surrounded with these friends.

The post seems to be mentioning 2 things - 1) having fun in get-togethers with friends who make sure they are part of it 2) people who just say they would like to meet but usually don't come.

When I started writing the post I wanted to stress more on the 2nd kind of people but ended up talking about the 1st kind. And I guess it is worth it because you got to care about people with whom you have good time. When I started writing this I thought the 1st party was good the 2nd could have been better while the 3rd wouldn't happen. All 3 happened and now I think I would take either of the 3 any day as there's nothing like being with friends and enjoying. So even though planning for a get-together is difficult it is worth the effort if you have friends like I mentioned above.

God wants you to know

Sometimes your mind is too occupied in things - some you know some you don't and most might not matter that much tomorrow. But what it does is leaves you in a confused or rather worried state. No matter how much you think you are okay there's something within that makes you feel uneasy. Of late I am going through a similar state.
They say sometimes the most unexpected things make you smile and forget your worries. Guess what the same happened with me tonight. I opened facebook and just clicked on one of the applications which goes something like 'God wants you to know'. And this is what came up -
"You've been worrying too much about the future lately. So tonight, go ahead, put your faith in God, and just have a peaceful evening and a restful sleep."
And believe me the moment I read this a sudden feeling of peace went through me. All the worries were gone for a moment and I felt pretty light. So I am going to do exactly as told - going to sleep :).
Thought this would be something nice to share with all...

Confessing something to a friend

Recently I met one of my best friends (you might say best friend should be one - I have given away that thought long back) and told him something - well how do I put it - something I shouldn't have said; but that something he needed to know and only way of him knowing that was when I said it to him. It may sound confusing but this is actually the way it was. Maybe I shouldn't have thought that way but it was true and so my thinking that way was justified. Well then he should have known it but then he said that for him to know certain things he needs to be told explicitly; so he couldn't have known that. Am I going in circles? Okay let me say it straight. This is what I told him -
"You know what dude I know I can count on you. If I need you, no matter what time, I can call you and I know you will be there. There are a lot of things that I want to talk to you about but can't, you know why, because I don't trust you to keep the things we talk about to yourself and I don't want someone else to know what I told you."

When I told this to him he was hurt (he didn't say anything but I could see it). Later I asked him if he knew this all along and he said that he knew I didn't tell many things to him but he didn't know why. And now that I have told him - bluntly - I don't know how he feels. I had wanted to tell him this for quite some time and now that I have done so I am glad that I did it.
I am pretty sure this doesn't spoil anything between us; because even though this doesn't look so good, it is the right thing. Being friends he ought to know certain things and I should be frank with him. I might have done this earlier or maybe in a better way but I think there's no point thinking about it now. And now that he knows the reason I am sure he understands a lot more things without saying.

Am I doing the right thing?

Today I have been thinking for sometime if I do the right thing. What is the thing here? I will explain. It goes like this -
I have conversations with my friends, relatives and other people. When they tell me something I always tend to show them the other possible ways. For instance when they say something about someone which they didn't like I always tend to tell them the various reasons why the other person could be behaving in that way and their actions weren't intended to hurt this person. Being a Libran - true Libran I may add - I always tend to analyse things from various angles and tend to often take the other side. Its not that I want to get into a arguement - not that I don't like to argue ;) - but its like trying to get into other's shoes and see things from their perspective. To cut this short what I try to do is make the other person see the same thing from different angles and make them realize that this also is an option that could happen. And I am pretty happy with this approach and am also very sure that this is the right approach.
So if I believe this is the right way then what is the problem? The problem is that I have started feeling that I am becoming too mechanical (practical should be the right term here but mechanical fits in better). Instead of making the other person comfortable I think I make them feel guilty - indirectly though - by taking the other person's side. Where I should be taking their side I kind of try to show them that their way of thinking is wrong. I have also started feeling that people might find me emotionless, too practical and often insensitive. I don't think I am either of these but then why have these thoughts surfaced in my mind?

This brings me back to the question - am I doing the right thing? My mind says I am doing the right thing as this approach helps people deicde what to do. My heart agree but only to some extent and says that sometimes I should go with them instead of trying to show them the other side.
I am too confused to decide (typical Libran style again). How about some help?

The Kolkatta Trip and a few realizations

Its been sometime since returning from Kolkatta and I have been thinking about writing about the trip. So here it is ...

I boarded the train from Delhi - Rajdhani AC 2 tier. As I was travelling in AC 2-tier after a long time I thought it would be fun but it turned out to be that there's not much difference in the 2-tier and the 3-tier except for the money :(. I had brought 3 books with me for the whole journey including the train journey so the journey wasn't too bad. We were to reach Kolkatta on shashti. My uncle there had some work so he couldn't come to the station. But we (I and my mom) took a pre-paid taxi and reached my uncle's place. The protima (idol of goddess Durga, goddess Saraswati, goddess Lakshmi, Ganesh ji and Kartik ji) had already come and was placed in the terrace where the Puja was to take place. Bodo Jethu (tauji or uncle) and Jethi (taiji or aunt) had already come. In the evening many relatives came - Bodo Pishi and Pishe, Mejo Pishi and Pishe, Tulu didi and Dhruva da along with thier kids, Rinku didi with her son. It was good to meet them after a gap of 3 years. Over the next 4 days met many other relatives as well - Debu Jethu, Choto Pishe, Babli didi and Probal dada, Joy dada, Mimi didi and Raja da, Mom and Shyamal, Tinni, the kids, et al. This time I also watched a lot of pandals there but unfortunately couldn't click any pictures as my camera memory somehow got full :(. But it was fun watching so many different pandals.

This trip also brought in new realization in me which maybe hadn't dawned on me till then...

It felt strange to see the kids - nephews and nieces - having grown up. They were playing around and making noises, the kind of things I used to do with my cousins. Seeing them do what I used to do not so long ago - or maybe it is that long - I went back the memory lanes where in I was called the 'dada' (as in gunda style :)) of my generation. Now I was old enough to scold the kids and just see them play instead of joining them.

On the other side I had my uncles and aunts who were aging and it showed. From the times when they used to run after me, used to play with me, do the daily chores so actively and participate in all the activities to today where in they get tired easily, can't run after the kids so just scold them, do only those things that are necessary; it has been a complete change.

Time flows and it takes in everyone. Of course people grow from kids to teenagers to adults to old people doing all the activities each age demands passing or rather rushing through each phase. I am also doing the same. But what stuck me this time around was that you don't realize how quickly you are rushing through life. When I look back, what seems like yesterday is in fact many years back. Most of us are so busy in our routine lives that we often forget the things that makes us smile, the things that we should give a high priority to instead of taking it for granted, the things we remember the most and wish we could have done more of it, the list goes on...

The last time I went to Kolkatta I thought it would be boring meeting my relatives after a long time as I wouldn't have much to say or do; but it turned out to be great fun. This time around the expectations were high which were not met but it made me feel that I should be in touch with them more often. The trip also made me see certain things which I won't be mentioning here but yes they made me sit up and notice and think.

To a heart broken friend

"The worst thing a girl can do is make a guy fall for her with no intentions of catching him" was the quote on my friend's gtalk status. The quote caught my eyes and I couldn't help but spend some time thinking about the quote and then my friend.
Yes my friend had a break-off and he is yet to get over it. He had a good time but from the outset I kept telling him not to go ahead with it; but he didn't listen to me and went ahead. It ended in a heart break and it hurt him. I am sure he will get over it but the problem is that he doesn't want to get over it. No matter how much I try I fail; yes he has been stubborn always.
A few days back he did something I never expected from him. I am not going to mention it here but its something he shouldn't have done. In the process he lied to his parents which again is something I don't approve of.
It wasn't meant to be like this. I have seen people go through this before but when it comes to someone so close to you, you can't help but feel - it wasn't meant to be like this. He never took life seriously, was always this fun loving guy but now he is no more that. He wouldn't say no to me or to his friends but at other times he will just spend time sleeping or doing nothing. He has lost interest in all the things that were of his interest; or for that matter he has lost interest in everything.
Coming to his relationship I have a feeling that he knew it from the first that its not going to work. Secondly he also kind of knew that the girl was using him just to get even with her boyfriend (he is going to kill me for writing this). But he still went ahead with all his heart and believed that he could succeed in getting her. It did not work out - I would say it wasn't meant to work out; but then I guess if I was in his place I would have done the same. Of course if you love someone you should at least try to go for it. But there comes a time when one has to accept the things as they are and move on instead of clinging to the non-existing hopes. I tried to make him see the things but he didn't want to see them. And now that the girl has asked him to stop harassing her (yes that's the word used by her after making him fall for her) my friend is even more frustrated. All he wanted to do was to hear from her why it won't work. I know it doesn't matter now but it matters to him. Maybe the girl is right in not wanting to talk or confront him as she doesn't want to continue the relationship. But he feels she owes him an answer.
It upsets me to see my friend hurt - it really upsets me; sometimes angers me. And I can't blame the girl because my friend knew from the start the things and the consequences. He took the risk well aware of the ill-effects and he is facing it now. I don't know how the girl is feeling and I don't care. And I have no complaints from her save one which is 'Why didn't she stop at the outset when she knew she couldn't continue?' For a few good moments she destroyed so much of someone. Is it fair? I guess it is; in today's selfish world it really is.
To my friend I would just like to say that "It happens dude; it happens to everyone. You are not the only one going through this. Keep the good memories and move on. Its difficult I know. But I also know you and I know that there's nothing you can't do. You can't undo something that has already happened but you can always paint a new picture. All you need to do is start afresh; and with a positive frame of mind. And you will always have your friends standing with you no matter what."

My Birthday Theory

It was my birthday recently. Some friends wished me some didn't. There were a few calls I was expecting that didn't come but then not all expectations come good.
I have my own theories on various things and have one on birthdays too which I call 'My Birthday Theory'. It goes like this - If you care for someone you would definitely wish him/her on his/her birthday. This may not seem valid to everyone but then again it is not meant to be validated by everyone; its something I believe in. And I do make it a point to wish my friends on their birthdays. Of course I miss some but then I am also human :). But I do try to make up for it by making sure I don't miss it the next time. There are few people I wish without actually speaking to them; this may not seem logical but then you are not always on talking terms with everyone and so this has to be the way sometimes.
Comming back to my birthday I really feel bad when someone doesn't wish me on my birthday expecially those people who are close to me. It feels as if they don't care. While they may say they forgot I don't take it for an answer as to me birthday is an important day for me and people who care for me should remember the days important to me. This year a lot of people - from whom I expected a call - didn't call on my birthday and I was hurt. I could write their names here but then does it really matter? If they don't care they actually don't. And this gives me a chance to see how many people actually care for me (this is one of my tests). Of course reminders in phones can remind you about birthdays but then again one needs to store it initially and then update the calendar of new phone. And in the end the way of remembering doesn't matter - what matters is remembering.

Back from Kolkatta

I returned from Kolkatta yesterday and it was a wonderful trip. Met uncles & aunts, cousins, nephews & neices. It really felt great to meet them. There were some not so good moments as well. I will discuss about the trip sometime later. This post is a look back at the checklist of things to buy from my last post (http://strictly-my-views.blogspot.com/2009/09/i-am-going-to-kolkatta.html) and I must say its not worth mentioning as I have very little to check in the list :(. Here it goes -

- A black leather bag for a friend (who didn't mention any design) - the shops were majorly closed so couldn't buy :(
- A kurta for another friend (who doesn't wear kurta) - got this one :)
- A farewell gift for another friend (I know nothing about his choice) - got this one too :)
- Sweets for some friends (most of whom would be on leave next week) - got very little sweets :(
- A soveigner (just added to the list by another old friend) - :( the markets were majotly closed
- Something for another friend (who hasn't specified anything and wouldn't get anything for me) - :(
- Tea for a friend who liked the sample - got this one as the shop was open :)
- Pictures for a friend who hasn't been to Kolkatta for long - :( my memory card full too soon
- Something for me as well - maybe clothes :) - didn't buy this too :( :(

Overall a poor report card I must say but then it was too hot and humid, then the markets were closed as well so I couldn't help it. Apologies to my friends whose things I missed; but I will remember to get those the next time :)

I am going to Kolkatta

I am going to Kolkatta tomorrow after a gap of 3 years. I am going there to celebrate Durga Puja :). The Puja will take place in my uncle's house and it is going to be a get together for the entire family. I enjoyed it very much the last time and now again I am hoping for the same :)
This time I wouldn't be spending too much time there - will reach on Shasthi and leave on Dashami. But its gonna be fun. Now how exactly the days went, this I would write about after returning from there. And I am hoping I will have many things to write.
Just as I am writing this post I am thinking about how things are going to be. And this time I am planning to do some shopping as well; but I am not sure if I will find time and the things. But lets see what all I have in mind -
- A black leather bag for a friend (who didn't mention any design)
- A kurta for another friend (who doesn't wear kurta)
- A farewell gift for another friend (I know nothing about his choice)
- Sweets for some friends (most of whom would be on leave next week)
- A soveigner (just added to the list by another old friend)
- Something for another friend (who hasn't specified anything and wouldn't get anything for me)
- Tea for a friend who liked the sample
- Pictures for a friend who hasn't been to Kolkatta for long
- Something for me as well - maybe clothes :)

Let's see how many I do get actually because I have my doubts :P. And so I haven't named the friends but I guess I am going to send them this link ;).

A complete disgrace to football

I have been restarining myself from writing this post for more than a week now but I think I should write about it just to spare me the trouble of deciding whether to write it or not. This relates to the Arsenal vs Manchester City match last to last Saturday which City won and particularly to a player named Emanuel Adabayor (I hope I have spelled the name correctly). Adebayor had been with Arsenal for more than 3 years now and has grown as a player during this time. I must mention here that Arsenal happens to be my favourite team. This summer Adebayor moved to Manchester City in a big money move. Being an Arsenal fan I had started liking this player and I must say he is a pretty good player. And understanding football as a game it was perfectly fair on his part to move to a new club which is financially rewarding to him and where he gets to play good football. Every player would want to do himself good till he is on top of his form after which his value diminishes; so it doesn't matter what people say but you got to make the best of your playing days. Till this it goes perfectly fine and I have no issues whatsoever.
During the match Adabayor scores and runs the length of the pitch to celebrate in front of the Arsenal fans. The fans have been booing him since his move - understandably so - and Adabayor is upset with this. So once he scores he gets his chance to get even with the fans and does this act out of pure emotion. And I can understand this. Although I would have liked him to show some respect to the fans I do understand that this kind of thing can happen in the heat of the moment and it is okay.
But what made me angry was when he tried to stomp Robin Van Persie on the face. Doing this to any player is totally un-acceptable but more so to your ex-teammate is absolutely disgraceful. This action of Adabayor really upset me. And the stomp nearly missed Van Persie's eyes which could have made it really dangerous. Had I been on the pitch I would have broken this guy's legs for sure. I am not joking but damn serious because this is how upset I was seeing his actions. All I can say is players like him are a total disgrace to football who lack the dignity to respect his ex-teammates and his old club which made him a star from a nothing player. Of course he had the talent but it was because of being at such a great club he got noticed and this is how thanks them. Its a shame.

I was on paper :)

I was on paper today - Navbharat Times (Hindi newspaper) edition - 18th September 2009, page - 2, under the heading 'third umpire'. I had said a few lines about the Gurgaon toll plaza and my photo got published in the paper with my comments. The interview had happened yesterday when my cab driver had gone to renew hi pass. A reporter popped up from somewhere and asked me for my views. I said what I had to say. He asked me to lower the window glass so that my picture could be taken. I did so.
Never in my wildest dreams had I thought that my photo would be published. In fact I had even said my cab mate that the guy's gonna just tear that page. She had assured me that it would be printed. And it did. The moment I got in the cab today the driver said "Appki photo aayi hai paper mein". I said "What?" and he showed me the paper. I asked him if I could keep it and he agreed. So now I have the paper with me to show that I was in paper.
There's nothing to boast of I guess but somehow I am feeling pretty happy about it. I never thought this would give me so much pleasure; but I guess for once the child within me has awaken as it has got something to cheer about.

Returning from office - one night

Everyday while leaving office I get the notification via email as to what my cab no is and who all are going in the cab. Usually I would look for a friend or a known person so as to make the return journey a little fun. The other day as the email notification popped up I saw a friend clubbed with me in the cab. And then there were only 3 people so I went down a little earlier than usual so as to get the back seat. I thought we would be chatting all the way as we usually do in the morning. So all geared up with probable things to talk I took my seat in the cab. But things don't go the way you want them to. And the same happened here - a 4th girl came in and sat in the middle. Not only that her drop was to be last as per the distance and as per company rules a girl should not be dropped last. So we told the transport guy that either give her a separate cab or her's will be the last drop. (A few days back we were forced to drop her and it took us extra 30 minutes to reach home) The girl didn't want to be dropped last, understandably so, but since there was no other cab available she had to give in. She was visibly upset but I didn't care as that had already spoilt the probable happy journey back. Whenever you plan it has to go wrong (thanks to HIM). So what could have been a conversation all the way turned into a small chit-chat here and there.
But the music playing on radio was too good - the saving grace probably. One song took me down the memory lane before I was brought back by the words "Come back to reality". Of course we couldn't have spoken with this 4th girl in between. And in the hindsight if I look back this friend of mine needed some rest; otherwise wouldn't have come early (that was early for my friend). So maybe HE was making sure my friend got the rest (HE always does that and I don't mind that :)).

And in the end I did end up dropping this 4th girl; and yes it took me 30 more minutes to reach home. I didn't care about this girl but still dropped her as I thought I should do so. More so probably because our conduct - of confirming her drop to be the last - had upset her; she was upset the entire way and I didn't want to miss the fun of seeing her expression change when I said to the driver after the 2nd drop "Let's drop her first".

HE has his means of getting things done by me and usually wins the battles between us (more on this someday later - maybe not). But one day I will get my chance :)

The burden is increasing

There are a lot of thoughts in my mind; in fact for quite some time they have been there. I have been thinking a lot about them but the more I think about them the more I get confused. The thoughts keep on seeking my attention and at times they would get some time but nothing happens; and they remain just that - thoughts. It feels kind of a pressure cooker where in the pressure is continuously increasing.
Of late I have started feeling the heat of the thoughts that has been disturbing my thought process. Although there has been no visible effect (this is my guess), sooner or later it will show up. Of course I will figure out a way; but when I don't know.
There are a lot of things I could do, rather should do, but I haven't been doing; and that too for no good reason. I would decide on doing a few things, then postpone it and then again postpone it. It seems as if I don't want to do anything; but then I want to do them. Its like I want to do 'A' but don't want to do it, want to do 'B' and don't want to do it (I know it sounds crazy). And in between I am doing what I am supposed to do and doing it the way it should be done.
My mind has become a complete jigsaw puzzle which needs to be sorted out. Sometimes I feel I am leading 2 lives at the same time - one visible to me and one to the world - and they are unaware of each other. The mind and the body are taking the burden. And the burden is increasing.
People say when you discuss things the burden decreases. Sharing your feelings helps you to calm down and release some of the pressure you have. I also advice the same to others - "instead of letting the things boil within you, you should bring them out". But in my case it seems to be working the other way. Speaking out seems to increase the burden. I spoke about some of my thoughts to someone today and the burden seems to have increased.
I am writing this post as this is supposed to make me feel better (according to one of my close friend). This doesn't seem to work either. The burden is increasing...

How different can people be at different times

"Meri chappal fir toot gayi" This was the first statement I heard as I picked up my phone. And it was followed by laughter. No it wasn't a prank; it was one of my friends calling me at around 12 noon when I was on way to office. There was a happiness in the voice - the happiness that you find in children who have done something unexpected, don't know what to do next but are laughing at their situation. She continued "I am midway to my office building and I can't walk" Some more laughter "Ab main kya karu?". I replied "Just pick the chappal up and walk barefoot" (I thought it was the logical thing to do although it was a bit ackward). "Namaste London types" she asked. I said yes. She said "Dekhti hoon". She was in this child mode again enjoying the situation which had stranded her midway in the heat; and here she was laughing at herself instead of panicking.

"I am not sure" I get an sms one day. I call her "Kya hua?". Her voice is sad. "We haven't had a 10 minute conversation in the last 3 days" She hasn't slept well the previous night. "People can be busy at times" I reply giving an explanation. "How busy can one be that one doesn't find even 10 mins in a day?" She has been thinking a lot. "There could be other reasons as well but its nothing to get so upset about" I say trying to give an explanation. "There is no reason for not calling and talking" She is hurt. "It is not that serious ..." and the conversation continues.

Same girl at 2 different instances. How different can people be at different times.

Reliving those Golden Moments

How often it happens that people think of some old golden days and wish they could relive them. I, myself - given the chance - would love to relive some old days. I don't know what stops people from redoing those things; or maybe I know but am not willing to accept. They say certain things just happen once in a lifetime and they are meant to be that - once in a lifetime.

What prevents people from re-doing the things they would love to do once more? Probably they don't get the same circumstances; Or maybe they don't find all those people; Or maybe all the people can't come together; Maybe that was one moment of madness and now shouldn't be repeated; Or maybe that event took place accidently; Or maybe that moment was so perfect that trying to repeat it may spoil that moment. (Maybe these are some of the reasons why I haven't tried)

But you know what today I found out that those moments can actually be relived and people do that without knowing it. I came to this realization while comming to office today. Not that I hadn't seen it before but somehow it never stuck me; and today somehow the chord struck me. We were 3 people in the cab. We were having a conversation which led to one of us going back to her old days. It was at first just a mention. But then she started going over the details. Her facial expressions were changing as she mentioned the details and the things they used to do. And at that point of time she was actually reliving those moments. For the remaining 2 of us it was just an event but to her it was soemthing different; something whose true value only she could understand. And at that instance as she was narrating she had travelled back in time, doing those things all over again.

And now as I am writing this blog, I am going back in time.....

Destiny - is it fixed?

Today while comming to office in my cab I had a conversation with my friend. The conversation started with marriage (will write a post on it soon) and somehow turned towards destiny. My friend said he believed in creating one's own destiny; that one's destiny is not fixed but one has the ability to make one's own destiny. I said I didn't agree to it and that one's destiny was fixed. We didn't come to any conclusion and our conversation ended when he got a phone call.
I have always believed that one's destiny is fixed. But the path towards one's destiny is not fixed. Everyone can choose his/her own path. One might not take the shortest route but eventually one would reach where one is destined to reach. One may have a smooth sailing or may be caught in a storm but either way if one is supposed to reach somewhere s/he will surely make it. There are people who say that one has the ability to make one's own destiny by working towards it. I have seen many cases where in people have given their best efforts yet they didn't achieve what they desired. Its not that they didn't try enough; its just that they weren't meant to get that.
One might question - "If one's destiny is fixed then why should one do anything? Whatever is to happen it will happen no matter what". Point taken. But even if your destiny is fixed you have to work towards it. Nothing happens without any action. For one, you don't know your destiny; so no point doing nothing. Then you can't just do nothing - at any time you would be doing something; and that something will take you towards your final destiny.
But the question remains "If your destiny is fixed what is the point putting in the effort?". The reason you need to put in the effort is because you want to enjoy the journey. You don't know your destiny and finally reaching there might not be well accepted by you. But what you can do is make the choice of the path to take, the road to travel and to do things you want to. Why waste today worrying about tomorrow.
There are people who believe in God and there are people who don't. Some common beliefs among people (especially spiritual and religious sorts) are God controls everything and whatever happens is done by Him. But then there is someone (I am forgetting the name :() who has said things a little differently and I quite liked what he said. He said that God is central to everything; but its like tying a rope around a cow and tying the other end of the rope to a nail or tree. The cow has the freedom to move in a specified area (equal to the area of a circle with radius equal to the length of the rope); but it can't move beyond it.
Its just how you look at things and believe in them. Whatever you believe in truly keep following it and you will reach where you are meant to. The most important thing is to enjoy the journey.

Final Destination 4

"I think we changed nothing. We were meant to be here at this time" These are the last lines from the film 'Final Destination 4'; and probably the only thing I liked about the movie. Saw the movie yesterday with a friend and it is right up there in my list of most disliked movies.
Maybe I had wrong expectations from the movie but still it was a total waste of money (I paid for the tickets) and time (ok not so much time - it didn't even last 1.5 hrs). And my friends comments were "I don't usually say a movie is bad but for this one I have to say it". You don't believe me or him then go and try watching it. By the way TOI gave it a rating of 1.5 (I wish I had seen the ratings in the morning).
Maybe watching it in 3-D would have been better. I haven't watched a movie in 3-D so far but I doubt if it would be fun to watch deaths in 3-D.

Sitting in office alone

8:30 PM - Sitting in office alone.
Today being a holiday in the US all the people in my account have gone home save me (and another guy). And I have more than 1 and 1/2 hours to spend. My work for the day is over the cab is scheduled for 10:15 PM.
I am wondering what all I could do in this time. Lets see what options I can think of -

• Write a blog (this of course I am doing right now)
• Chat: let me see who are online - P with whom I already chatted for quite long, M logged in just now
• Play: in office it shouldn't be done; so let me postpone it
• Listen to music: Already doing
• Study: next please
• Meet someone: Well odd timings mean no one's around :(
• Call someone: shouldn't bother someone at night

So where does that leave me? I guess blogging, chatting and playing

Conversation with Manas: How to earn quick money

This Sunday I was sitting with Manas at McDi. I asked him what's the way of earning quick money. As he started thinking I added "legally".
The conversation went like this.
Manas: How much risk do you want to take?
I: Minimum
M: Initial investment?
I: Minimum
M: What do u want to do with the money?
I: Buy Bose speakers and a Scorpio - cash down
M: Anything else?
I: An LCD TV as well
M: Anything else?
I: For now that's all
M: Soch le acche se
I: Soch liya
I: Will it be a continuous inflow or once?
M:It is advisable to do it once. Repeating it is not advisable and may not yield same results.
I: Okay. So what's the plan?
Manas kept quite for abt 30 secs and then said "Shaadi kar le"

An old friend; whom you miss

There's a person who happens to be an old friend of yours. Old friend in the sense that there was a time when you were very good friends; but then you had a fight and you are no longer friends. There are times when you remember the old times and feel sad that you miss those moments now. And if that friend happened to be a very close friend or more than just a friend then you miss those moments more. And if that friend happens to be of opposite sex then you miss the moments even more. And then when you spot that friend suddenly somewhere what do you do? You feel like going to that friend and ask "How are you? What's up lately?". And you have a lot of similar questions to ask. But you can't do that. Especially if you have been told to keep distance and not to interfere in their lives. So what do you do? There's nothing you can do. You carry on doing what you were doing; your mind goes back to the old days; you are covered with the memories; the past fills your mind; untill you shrug it off and move on.
Of course you can't do much about it. Or can you? You can go to the person and try to make things alright; try to make a new beginning; try to go back to the good old days. But would it help? The gaps that have been created - will they fill? The wounds that haven't healed yet - will they heal? Will the other person like to go back to the old days; or is that person better off without you? These are the questions that can't be answered easily. And whether it is worth the effort to find the answer is for an individual to decide.
You decide to move on because it is the only option. You make new friends, start afresh and march ahead. But why does the past keep comming back to you? Its got to be for some reason but you never know the reason. Maybe its because you still hope somewhere deep down inside that you could make a new beginning; or maybe you feel it was mistake you made and you need to pay for it; or maybe just because you still care.

Can I call him selfish?

Yesterday, as usual, I took the cab at 10:15 PM for home. It was an indica and there were 4 of us. One guy took the front seat and was giving the directions. The sequence of drop was supposed to be such that mine was the first drop and his was last. The sequence was based on the shortest route and the relative distance from office. But what that guy (his name is Kanwarjeet Singh) did was took the cab straight to his home first, got down and moved on. I didn't know the way he took so didn't ask any questions and by the time realized what he was up to it was little too late. It didn't matter too much since my house wasn't too far from there but it made me think how selfish people can be. Although it didn't matter much yesterday, it would have mattered if the last drop was of a girl. The routes here are so designed that the last drop is not of a girl; and if it happens so then a guard accompanies the girl. But with these kind of people around there should be a re-think.
Its not about my getting late by 10 mins; it is about the nature, rather character, of a person. I don't know him and from our trip last night the best adjective that I can use for him is SELFISH. This type of incident is very rare here but then these things go out to show how different people can be. Its kind of an unwritten protocol where in the sequence of drops is based on the distance from office and most people follow it. Of course everyone would like to have the first drop but then thats not how groups work. But some people have there own thinking - which revolves totally around them. There are these kinds of people as well and you got to live with it. May god bless him. I just hope that guy never comes in my cab again :).

Chandigarh and a Sleepless Night

The new season of Barclays Premiere League was to start this weekend. Having shifted to my new home a week before meant we had to get a cable/DTH connection to watch TV. I was on leave on Friday; so I used it to get Tata Sky connection. I had initially gone for a combo offer from Airtel but their broadband line hasn't reached my area (which of course is pretty sad as it is available in the nearby areas; and by the way my experience with airtel hasn't been good earlier). The Tata Sky people came in the afternoon and did the installation and finally I was all set for the BPL season to start on Saturday. My friends from my previous company called and said there was a get together for lunch. I agreed as I would have been back in time to see the matches. The lunch was fun and it reminded of the good old days.

Just when I was heading back Manas called and said Deepak was asking about going out of town for a day. I replied "I am busy till 11:30 PM after which I can go". Manas said it was okay and we started working out options about places we could go. Finally we settled for Chandigarh (I had stressed on Kasauli and believed we were heading towards it untill we reached Chandigarh the next morning :)). They picked me at around 11:45 PM and we headed towards Chandigarh. We started of enquiring about each other's life which moved from person to person and soon revolved around girls. Deepak had his usual stories and Manas had his theories and I had my own logic which lead to a nice conversation (or should I say passing the parcel). We stopped midway for a cup of tea when I was almost asleep and continued the journey. Deepak was in his singing mood and kept on singing in what I called his accented voice. We didn't mind as Manas is a silent singer and the lesser I say about me the better :) (to be frank I couldn't hear Deepak's voice much ;)). We reached Chandigarh in the wee hours of the morning with everything closed and we dying to catch some sleep. Finally after roaming all over Chandigarh, Panchkula, ManiMajra etc we decided to park the car in parking and sleep for sometime. I couldn't sleep as the mosquitoes didn't let me sleep; Manas couldn't sleep either as the flies didn't let him sleep; but Deepak did manage to sleep despite the mosquitoes and flies. He would have been tired after his dance classes.

The next morning after Deepak got up we deicided to go to Sukhna Lake. It was around 5 and there were lots of people. People of all ages were there for morning walk; some for their daily exercises and some just to get some fresh morning air. Manas - all set for morning walk - started walking followed by Deepak and me (reluctantly). We would have covered about a km before I stopped while the others continued. I sat there for a while enjoying the view and watching the people doing what seemed their routine act. I then started walking again and when I covered another half a km I stopped there. Manas and Deepak returned after a while and we started walking back. We reached the starting point and since we had nothing to do we just sat there doing nothing. Deepak and Manas tried to sleep but couldn't. We started from there at around 9 looking for something to eat. It seemed the entire Chandigarh was closed as we didn't find a single shop open for almost an hour and whoever we asked said shops will open after 11:30. Deepak was wanting to have beer since the last night but couldn't get any as it was dry day. As we were looking for a place to eat we saw a couple of wine and beer shops open. So we took a turn to get to the shops. Just before them we found a place to eat which was open. We went there and ate parathas. By the time we finished the breakfast Deepak had dropped the idea of beers. But now he wanted to go to amusement park. He got the directions and we headed towards it but didn't find it and almost got out of the city. So we headed back to Sukhna lake as it was the only open place we knew :). When we went there this time it was buzzing with people. The lake was full with boats, the shops there had opened, and even the rides for the kids had opened. There was a electronic bull ride which Deepak wanted to take while I and Manas resisted. So we went ahead and sat facing the lake. Deepak started talking about the songs he had written specifically mentioning the song he had given to his third girlfriend. Manas urged him to sing the song and he obliged after a little deliberation. I have to admit Deepak has got talent when it comes to writing songs. Soon he moved on to other songs. I told him about the accent he used while singing to which he said its natural and we had a minor debate which ended in we agreeing to disagree. Then as we deicided to head back Deepak deicded to take the bull ride. He ended up being the only grown up (we might prefer not to call him a grown up though) to take that ride. He made a mockery of himself there. We left Sukhna Lake and as we headed back we stopped at Rock Garden. Manas's comment to me "If it is the first time you have come to Chandigarh you must visit Rock Garden". So we visited it. I found it a wonderful place and it was all there due to an innovative idea of its founder Nek Chand. We went through the designated pathway covering the entire Rock Garden and it looked great.

Finally it was time to head back to Delhi. We had decided to stop at Haveli on the way for lunch. We reached Haveli around 4 PM. We didn't find it a good place to eat but still ate something and drove back. I don't remember much further as I was either sleeping or falling asleep or waking up to fall asleep again. Deepak was probabaly sleeping too. Manas though didn't sleep and drove non-stop till we reached Delhi. They dropped me at my home and then got caught in traffic on their way back before reaching home late at night. I didn't have dinner at home and slept soon only to wake up next morning with a little headache. We all were back to our daily routines after a sleepless night and a trip to Chandigarh.

Life's lessons

For once instead of writing anything I am pointing to a link which mentions 45 life lessons. One could do with reading it once a few days. Here's the link -

http://blog.cleveland.com/pdextra/2007/09/regina_bretts_45_life_lessons.html

A boring team event

On 24th last month we went on a team outing.

The venue - Botanix Garden near Dumduma lake.
No of people - around 40
Weather - Hot and humid
Event theme - shaadi


Let me tell you the sequence of events. Before we proceeded towards the venue everyone assembled in the team area. A no of guys were called out in the centre to perform some act so as to woo the bride. The bride wasn't announced yet. A few names were called out and they were forced to perform. Once through with that the bride was announced. The entire team was divided into two parts - ladkiwala and ladkawala. The bride had to chose a groom which she did without much fuss - selecting the quietest guy of the lot. Then everyone proceeded to the venue in three cabs (two travera and one innova) and personal vehicles. The three cabs lost the way and ended up travelling through villgae and muddy rough roads before reaching the destination - some 1 hour late and 20+ kms extra. When people reached the venue the breakfast was ready and everyone jumped to it. There was cutlet (okay), sandwich (not worth mentioning), tea/coffee (the cup plates weren't so clean). Breakfast done the first event came up where in a scene was created where the ladkawalas have come to see the bride and family. The entire thing lasted about an hour with some people involved while others just standing there. As soon as it got over the guys rushed to play cricket and volleyball. They played for quite sometime which led to the girls getting bored and they finally came over to ask the guys to stop playing. Then lunch followed. Lunch was okay. Then the next event began which included sari contest for men. mehendi contest for men and pagdi contest for women followed by ladkawala versus ladkiwala. Then it was time for the DJ. And then the event was over with people heading back home.


My take on the entire event - writing about it so far has been more fun than the entire event. It was a total wastage of time for me. My reasons:
- No attempt was made to make everyone participate
- The theme was pretty strange I would say
- The food wasn't that good - in fact it was below average
- There was no drinks arrangement at the venue - it was done by the event team
- DJ in the open at 5:30 PM in summer

I would say it was a complete waste of the day for me. The venue no doubt was beautiful but was not suitable for summer daytime. Team events are either meant to be for fun or for getting the team together - but this was neither. There was no build up to the event. The event itself was so boring that people left 30 minutes before the scheduled end time.

Happy Friendship Day

Friendships day is meant to be spent with your close friends (Although I often say I don't celebrate such days; but sometimes I do feel we could do with a little celebration). You often don't get time to celebrate some days and when you have bought a new house and are on the verge of shifting you hardly find any time. I was at the house getting things done - the dining table and centre table were to arrive while the plumber had to do some work and we were waiting for the electrician. I had anticipated work to get over by 2 PM and thought of going for a movie with Manas. But as plans often end up the work got delayed by a good few hours. I asked Manas if he could come to my house and he was there at around 5 PM. The work here was also winding up. So we left for The Great India Place (TGIP) in Noida.
We bought tickets for the movie 'Love Aaj Kal'. The seats we got were corner seats of first row (probabaly the last available tickets). Imagine paying 165 bucks for the front row seats; that too when the movie was some 2 hours away and you had nothing to do in those 2 hours. We went to Barista to have something to eat and drink. Then we strolled through TGIP walking around talking. Finally some 30 minutes before 8:10 PM (the movie start time) we decided to head towards the hall and maybe find some seat as the legs had started aching. We couldn't find any place to sit and kept standing and watching people around. We saw a drunk girl being escorted by her friends. The girl was moving zigzag, couldn't walk or stand still as her friends' expressions changed from smile to anger to concern.
Finally went inside and there too was no place to sit (we hadn't entered our audi yet). As the start time was nearing the crowd was increasing. It was 8:10 and still the doors weren't opened. The crowd had become very large (as you expect for a houseful show). People started getting impatient; one aunty caught hold of a staff and threatened her that if the movie doesn't start in another 5 minutes money has to be refunded. The dumb-stuck staff somehow managed to escape her.
Finally the doors opened and we entered. We had meanwhile got ourselves Nachos and Pepsi. The Nachos had two sauces - salsa and cheese. Manas eats only cheese sauce while I take only salsa; so we exchanged the sauces each having two of his favourite. (Now that's called understanding :)). The movie started and it was an okay movie (rather better than okay it was good - Manas might disagree though). It brought back some old memories (not anything so serious though :P).
After the movie we went to get something to eat. Manas wanted donut while I wanted something to drink. He got his donut while I got a Litchi shake. He didn't like the donut while the Litchi shake was ok. We had called Deepak and he said he would be comming. We called him again and he said he wouldn't be able to make it. He had to drop his friends at the station and didn't feel like comming to Noida after that (He has this habit of not turning up but when he does turn up its lot more than fun). So it was the two of us only. We went to Atta and found a place which was open at around 12 midnight. I had called up a couple of friends to get the location and finally we reached it. There we ordered something both of us like - Maggi. After finishing it he dropped me at my home and went to his home.

Two friends - one movie - Maggi in the open at midnight - some old memories and some future talk - what could be better on a friendship day?

Traffic rules in Delhi

Recently I thought of learning driving (yes I don't drive yet). This thought occured to me when I was sitting in the cab on my way to office. Suddenly I saw a Qualis take a sudden turn in front of our car and our driver had to apply brakes bringing our car to a sudden abrupt halt. This prompted me to write this post; so this post is dedicated to all the people in Delhi who follow their own traffic rules which is as follows:

- If you have to take a right turn you should be at the extreme left lane and vise versa.
- The moment a Qualis or Travera gives an indicator they will turn. They don't have to care for other vehicles.
- If a bus blows horn its path has to be cleared no matter how far the bus is.
- If your lane is busy you can use the opposite lane.
- There's always scope for another lane.
- Two wheelers can get through even the slightest of space; the other vehicles need to adjust.
- On toll gates you are free to switch lanes and move between the lanes. You don't need a toll card to be in tag lane.
- You can park the car anywhere on the road; the other cars will manage.
- You can stop on the road to talk to someone on opposite lane.
- One who has the loudest horn can honk for as long as s/he wants.
- Lane driving is for learners.

The moment I think of starting driving my mind diverts towards the above rules and I drop the idea of driving. Maybe some day I will learn to follow the rules and drive on Delhi streets.

Furniture hunting

Buying a house is not easy and having bought the house isn’t the end of the trouble. In fact it is beginning of a whole new set of troubles. Don’t agree with me? Wait till the end of this post.

Having bought the house the next thing was to buy furnitures. This required us to make a list of furnitures to buy and then where to put them. We zeroed in on 2 double beds, a sofa set, a dining table set. Not much; are they? Let’s see…

Let’s start with the double bed. I am 6 feet tall; so the normal 6*6 bed doesn’t suit me. Thus one of the double beds should be at least 6.5 feet. And then since we were going for customized bed we thought of getting some design on frames and also some boxes near the top side. The bed length increased to about 7.5 feet. Easy enough. Not exactly. The question that stood in front of us now was will it fit in the room. So we went to the new house with a measuring tape and measured the rooms. One room was about 10 feet wide while the other was 9 feet. We had to have at least 3 feet space. So the beds could not be more than 7 feet and 6 feet respectively. This meant no boxes in the bed on the head side and it had to have just frames. One’s plan doesn’t always work the way they are meant to.
So the size finalized it was time to decide from where to buy. Dad had a known person who had supplied good pieces to office folks. So we had a reliable person and decided to order through him. Now to see samples we had to meet him and the actual makers. That guy lives on the western side of the city while we live in the east. So on Sunday, in a very hot and humid weather, we travelled across the city to meet the concerned people. In between, we had seen a decent offer from Big Bazaar for a double bed cum dressing table plus something. The only doubt was regarding the material of the bed. So we asked our guy (and also the actual makers) about that. One of them told that it is the latest thing and is good but needs to be kept away from water. The other guy said that its not good. Another confusion. We decided not to go for the offer and ordered 2 beds. Things don’t end here. Now we had to chose the design. That’s pretty easy if you have some design in mind; and if you don’t … well … god help you. And to add to that my dad passed the brochure to me to select the design. After going through the catalog a no of times I selected one design. Now I had to select another design which had some specifications. I did manage to select the designs. The double bed chapter got closed.

Next in line were the sofa sets. That was to be ordered to another guy who specializes in sofas. So we went to another place where this guy came with his files. He showed a sofa set and said “I have made these kind of sofas recently and they were liked by the people.” In fact one of them was known to dad. I rejected the design on its first look. The guy persisted with it for some time giving all sorts of logic and I – like I am – refused to budge. Having safely negotiated it I was given a bunch of photographs of sofa designs to chose from. And here I was again doing something which I don’t like doing – choosing. But then whenever I asked dad to do the choosing thing he would say “It’s your house so you decide”. And so I had to do it. I chose a design finally. The design being selected, it was now turn of the material to be used for the covers. Another selection dilemma. To add to it my dad said “You don’t like all the materials, so you chose the one you feel will be good”. So I sat with another set of catalog selecting a material to be put on the sofa. After a few rounds I selected one material (which was later changed to another one). All over. Not yet. Now we had to choose the colour. Another tough task; but made easy as the no of options were less for the material chosen. Here I was helped by others and finally we had the design ready with all accessories.
Things weren’t quite over yet. Now was the turn of the no of sofas to buy. We had thought of 3+1+1 but the seller told it was out of fashion and our guy agreed to it. So we could go for 3+2, 2+2, 3+2+2 or we could add a couple of puffys to 3+2 or 2+2. I called home to ask for some help and got the same answer “It’s your house so you decide”. When you don’t want to decide something it turns out that you are the only one who has to decide. So I went for a 3+2 sofa set with 2 puffys.

The orders were placed. Now with double-bed and sofa set done we are left with dining table set and centre table. These we might go for ready made and so shouldn’t be that difficult. Well… I will get a first hand experience when I do that; and maybe write about it as well.

Furniture hunting is still on. And ya when the furnitures finally come I will have to face the reaction of my mom and sister who don’t have the slightest idea of the deigns chosen by me. Keeping my fingers crossed.

I wish I could be childish more often

Yesterday I was talking to a friend of mine about buying furnitures for my new house (Yes I have bought a house recently). Before I said anything more she jumped with joy. She suddenly became very excited and asked "You would be having fun shopping for the furnitures?". There was a glow on her face and she was beaming. I was kind of surprised and replied "I have left it to my parents to decide on the furnitures". She couldn't believe it. She said "How can you not be excited. I remember when a friend of mine had bought a new house we had spend days deciding the furnitures. We would go places every weekend and search shops for everything right from lamp shades to double-beds and would make a list of what to buy from where. It was so exciting." Her face was completely lit up with excitement as I sat there staring at her. I finally said "Why don't you do the same for my house?" to which she just smiled; still lost in her thoughts from the past. (Here I must say that she was looking tired a little while earlier and now she was so enthusiastic and excited).
I was wondering if it was indeed so much fun shopping for furnitures and I soon came to the conclusion that it was not. It was just furniture and that too would lose its charm in a few weeks no matter how much time I spent selecting it. But watching her I could compare her to a kid who has just received a new toy and is thrilled by it. She noted down the topic in her notepad and said it would be a nice topic to write upon - An empty house (Yes she is a blogger and writes well).

Now as I think about it, it seems quite different from last afternoon. Buying furnitures is an activity. One could do it as a thing to do (duty) or enjoy doing it as if it were a whole lot of fun. It may sound childish but then who doesn't want to be childish at times? And there's no denying that children are happier than grown-ups. Doing things with a child's enthusiasm will make the whole process enjoyable and might lead to a better ending; but no matter what you would enjoy doing it.
I wish I was a bit like her at times ( not always; as she gets excited about small things and enjoys them but then there's another side of her as well :)); not that things don't excite me but its just that I could be enthusiastic about more things. It could just be that different people get excited about different things - which of course is true - or it could be that growing up includes giving up on being enthusiastic about most of the things. I wish I could be childish more often. The kind of enthusiasm I have while playing could be included in many more things. There's no point in missing the fun in the things you do. Of course there's a line to be drawn between doing and overdoing but I guess I have drawn my line a little too soon.
Lets see if I can be a child more often.

Introduction - Joining a new team

Its become kind of a tardition to induct new joinees; and its a good practice. But there is no set pattern and there are various ways of doing so. I have gone through it a number of times. Earlier it used to be a general introduction either in a team meeting or going to the individual seats of the team members. But it seems to be different in my current company; where I have been through it a no of times. Here there is a team intro which is usually in a team meeting and then you are introduced to the entire account is an account meeting.

First time it happened in the induction batch where we were some 15 people. The things to do there was your general intro followed by your hobbies. A simple intro. The following sessions also had a round of intro usually on the same pattern but some had a nice ending (you can call it the desert) like your favourite actor/actress, least favourite actor/actress, etc.

The next time it happened was for a training batch where the batch was a chosen one, chosen from a large no of people. The intro here was same as mentioned above but this time followed by a movie you disliked (a nice idea just to put some fun in the process and it did turn out that way as people actually questioned others how could you dislike it).

This was not exactly an intro but a game involving intro. In this everyone had to form a pair and then your pair was to give your intro in the first person and then the others would ask questions from your pair about you. It was real fun. Here are a few examples -
A boy who paired with a girl was giving the intro of the girl (It was Nitin saying "Hi I am Rashmi"). And one of the questions asked to him (acting as a girl) was "What are you doing this weekend?".
In another case a guy paired with a married girl was asked "What's your husband's name?" and he couldn't answer.
In another case, where two guys A and B were paired, B comes and starts apeaking "Hi I am A and I am very stupid. I have this bad habit of ....". And the poor guy A stands there helplessly listening.

Then in the next intro after the usual thing people were asked to tell about 2 things that were unknown to others (Now this was too much; as it people didn't know much about you and so practically everything about you was unknown).

The next was when people had to sing a song after their brief intro. Now this was fun as this got people involved and brought in a comfort factor. Not many like to sing a song in public but it gives opportunity to people who like to sing but don't find audience :).

So I was kind of getting used to intros and thinking about what would be next. But my recent intro today (I joined a new team and today was the account meeting) turned out to be a plain simple one. And although I wanted it to be like this now that I am writing this blog I feel the previous intros were much more fun.